Saturday, October 27, 2012

The Storm Zombies

       Here we are at the end of October already. Where did the summer go? How did September fly by so quickly? All pointless questions at this stage of the game. It's over. There will be no nice weather until possibly April, if we're lucky, but more likely it'll be May.  The sky is set in perma-grey mode, about as cheerless a color as one can find in nature. Sure the leaves are all beautiful shades of orange, yellow and rust, but their days are numbered, especially with the advent of the Frankenstorm looming on the horizon.  If you haven't heard about this storm you are either stupid, have no access to media of any kind, or you don't speak english. I've never seen so many giddy meteorologists struggle to hide their mirth as they describe what the east coast is about to endure next week.  Of course, they don't want to sound like they're happy about this storm since it has potential to destroy, destruct, maim and kill, but the magnitude of the weather system has them all freaking out, like toddlers jacked up on gummy bears and Red Bull.

  I'm not really sure how hard we'll get hit in Millbrook. By the looks of things thus far, we'll get a lot of rain and high winds. Power will most likely go out and trees will fall across roads. Jonathan made a prudent point this morning that we'd better stock up the vodka in case power goes out for more than a couple of days. He's super thoughtful like that. We just came back from the grocery store, and the place was a total mob scene. Actually, all the stores in Millbrook are teeming with people that we have nicknamed, "The Storm Zombies".

"Must buy milk, bread and water!''

"Flashlights, batteries and candles!"

"Propane, kerosene, gasoline!"

   The Storm Zombies clog the aisles, shuffling along on their big, slow feet, arms outstretched as they grab at items to fling in their shopping carts. Buzzing conversations can be heard all around the stores. "Are you ready for this?"  "It's going to be a devastating storm, are you prepared?" "They say it might last for days!!!"  "I hope it won't be as bad as is predicted!"

  With the timing of the storm landing directly on Halloween, the children are all teary eyed and whiny that Trick or Treat night will be cancelled for the second year in a row. Last year's massive blizzard obliterated Trick or Treat in many areas, and the kids are bitter and shaken that it might happen again. Some parents have ganged up on town officials and lobbied for Trick or Treat night to be moved to Sunday, pre-empting Armageddon.  Good thinking, there. The end of the world might be just around the corner, so let's give the kiddies a parting memory of childhood glee so when the house blows down around them they can shove a final tootsie roll in their mouths and say, "Well, at least we had one last Trick or Treat night!"  Good heavens.

  It's hard to not get caught up in the hype of a major weather event, but it is a curious phenomenon to witness. People are taking this one very seriously, much more so than an ordinary snow storm, or hurricane prediction. This storm appears to be a triple threat, a dangerous hybrid cocktail of every type of horrible storm ingredient all mixed into one. A young man even gave us a flyer on "Storm Preparation" as we left the grocery store. It didn't tell us anything that we didn't already know, but I read it just in case there was one key pearl of wisdom that might keep us from floating into the Hudson when the Frankenstorm hits.  I really hope everyone stays safe, especially my friends and family who live on the coastlines.  So, lets all brace ourselves for a wild ride and pray that it doesn't cause too much damage, or take any lives, but according the the weather men we don't have a snowman's chance in Hell for getting around this one.

Good luck peeps and may the force be with you.

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